I'm Climbing Up Those Walls Again

Ok, this is probably going to be one of my weirder posts, but please bear with me. I want to have a contest. Anyone I know can enter, and I encourage all of you to do so, as it'll make it more fun. Here's the question:

Which gender is better off in terms of sexual organs?

You can make your argument based on functionality, aesthetics, etc; anything to get the point across. Now, as if this wasn't hard or embarrassing enough, you have to make your argument using one of these methods:

1. Write your argument in a haiku form (or series of haikus)

2. Make your argument as you would make it to a 2nd grader (or make it as a children's story, but don't make the characters children, you sick bastard).

3. Make your argument as you would make it as part of a high school graduation speech

4. Pretend you are convincing someone not to jump off of the 25th story of a building, but that person is off the opposite gender of the gender you are arguing for :)

5. Pretend you are in one of those confessional booths you find in Catholic Churches

6. Make the argument with a focus on your major (i.e. if you are doing Marketing, market the vagina! Talk about the physics of the penis, or the economics behind breasts (yes, Kate, we’ll include those too). The majors I don't think I'll allow are biology/chemistry, or psychology (sorry Scott) they would fit too well.

7. Pretend you are the organ you are making an argument for. How do you feel?


Entries should be posted in the comments section by midnight on Sunday. Be creative, but also make sure you make your point.

The winner will received their own person Own3d pic, assuming I have a picture of them somewhere on my computer owning someone (If not I'll Photoshop one). Let me know if you have any questions.

May the force of your respective reproductive organs be with you!

... I've been writing in this blog since July 2002. I just checked my user stats and found that this post will be #191, and I've written 26,796 words since the start. That's enough to fill a book, although not a very interesting book.

I have a question, if you had to write something that was 26,000 words long, starting now, what would you write it about? Assume you can't do any research for it beyond your own and general knowledge.

Sure, it's got a really lame name, but this has turned out to a really fun take on the typical Diablo formula. It is very hack and slash, but has a very open-ended quest-based world to explore. The graphics are really crisp (nice to get away from the 800x600 bane of Diablo II) and the music is pretty sweet as well. At first it was a little hard to get used to, as I was pretty much just running away from everything, but once I got ahold of this nasty big mace, the tables turned. Mwahahahaha.

As you can see, my first impressions weren't quite so great.


I was killed shortly after by about 100 skeletons waiting around the corner.



Now, once I got the mace, I wandered into a good-guy army camp for a little R&R, but it was not meant to be. When I got to the very center, a wizard appeared and mind-controlled the entire goddamn camp and commanded them to attack me. So what did I do? I killed every single one of them in a huge, epic fight. Here is a pic of me about to bury my awesome mace into some poor sap's head:




Divine Divinity takes a while to get into, but it wasn't nearly as bad as the start of Morrowind (Another excellent game):








And finally... imagine you are a n00b at a game, and you are just wandering around to stay alive.. and you see this. Would you be scared?


Listening to: JED - Typical Alien Image