Saturday, August 10, 2002
Hi, this isn't Matt speaking, this is a letter written by his military commander based at the IBM THINKPAD STATION. As you might have all heard, the country has been enveloped in the War of the W95.CIH Virus since Wednesday afternoon. We all know Matt believes in this cause, so he was one of the first to volunteer. He's stationed in a Compaq System running Windows ME, fighting on the front lines as we speak. This may be the end of the world, we're not sure. We did receive a transmission from him yesterday, but it is the last communcation we've heard in 24 hours... here it is:
TRANSMISSION 01021883- kargos@rocketmail.com
Captain Matt Collin reporting:
"We're surrounded by them as we speak... they've infected almost every executable on the computer... I don't know if" -TRANSMISSION INTERUPTED-
"We're all holed up in explorer.exe... the bastards took it from us earlier today, but we pushed them back out... Microsoft folder like France did in World Wars I & II, allowing the enemy to spread all over the place. Our allies, Symantec, bailed out earlier today... and" -TRANSMISSION INTERUPTED-
"Good god... we just lost Start Up Disk # 2..." *Explosions in background." "We're never going to make it."
"Goodbye everyone... I'm going to be in explorer.exe when the W95.CIH storms it. We'll see what happens from there....."
"Oh god... there are pulses being fired down the hall.... taskmon.exe just got deleted! I think that.." -TRANSMISSION ENDED-
Ladies and gentlemen... may your prayers go out to him. Over and Out.
Listening To: Alkaline Trio - Private Eye
TRANSMISSION 01021883- kargos@rocketmail.com
Captain Matt Collin reporting:
"We're surrounded by them as we speak... they've infected almost every executable on the computer... I don't know if" -TRANSMISSION INTERUPTED-
"We're all holed up in explorer.exe... the bastards took it from us earlier today, but we pushed them back out... Microsoft folder like France did in World Wars I & II, allowing the enemy to spread all over the place. Our allies, Symantec, bailed out earlier today... and" -TRANSMISSION INTERUPTED-
"Good god... we just lost Start Up Disk # 2..." *Explosions in background." "We're never going to make it."
"Goodbye everyone... I'm going to be in explorer.exe when the W95.CIH storms it. We'll see what happens from there....."
"Oh god... there are pulses being fired down the hall.... taskmon.exe just got deleted! I think that.." -TRANSMISSION ENDED-
Ladies and gentlemen... may your prayers go out to him. Over and Out.
Listening To: Alkaline Trio - Private Eye
Thursday, August 08, 2002
Are honor students even allowed to use the word pimp?
Our room for next semester is going to be the definition of pimp. We're going to have a couch and I'm going to wire it so whenever two people sit in the couch, the lights will dim and a random soul music song will start playing. /7 Gonna hold you in my arms forever /7
But no, really, our room should be pretty cool. We have these movie nights where everyone crams in the room to watch a DVD, and the couch will definately add large amounts of happiness to those events.
Oh yeah, if you are apolitical, watch out, because the next post will be:
MATT VS THE UPCOMING WAR ON IRAQ Only on Pay-Per View
Since there is no central topic of this post I'll just post some random quotes:
Kristina: "Oh no, trust me, this is waaaaaay better than porn!"
Brian: "What could possibly be better than porn?"
Scott: "Shut up! She's going to tell us!"
--------------------------
Kate: "Help help! The bad-ass has been killed by an alien!"
Scott: "My god! HRUAAAAAAAAAAEERG!"
---------------------------
Matt: "So you just enter the equation into... the black box.. and you get the answer?"
Carter: "Great, isn't it?"
---------------------------
Matt: "Hey Kyle! Did you hear about the plan to get revenge on the girls?!?!"
Kyle: "Wuuueelllh, yeah"
---------------------------
Matt: *Undecipherable yelling*
Kristina: *Laughing* "I can't believe you guys did that!"
Brian: *Hits Kristina with water balloon* "Ohhhh! Score!"
Scott: "I think Kimmie has escaped some punishment!"
Kristina: "It's rolling down my pants, oh God!"
Matt: "Score one for the good guys!" *Kimmie runs up behind Matt*
Scott: "Watch out, watch out!" *Hits Kimmie with water balloon*
Everyone: *Laughs*
Listening to: Sepultura - We Who Are Not As Others
Our room for next semester is going to be the definition of pimp. We're going to have a couch and I'm going to wire it so whenever two people sit in the couch, the lights will dim and a random soul music song will start playing. /7 Gonna hold you in my arms forever /7
But no, really, our room should be pretty cool. We have these movie nights where everyone crams in the room to watch a DVD, and the couch will definately add large amounts of happiness to those events.
Oh yeah, if you are apolitical, watch out, because the next post will be:
MATT VS THE UPCOMING WAR ON IRAQ Only on Pay-Per View
Since there is no central topic of this post I'll just post some random quotes:
Kristina: "Oh no, trust me, this is waaaaaay better than porn!"
Brian: "What could possibly be better than porn?"
Scott: "Shut up! She's going to tell us!"
--------------------------
Kate: "Help help! The bad-ass has been killed by an alien!"
Scott: "My god! HRUAAAAAAAAAAEERG!"
---------------------------
Matt: "So you just enter the equation into... the black box.. and you get the answer?"
Carter: "Great, isn't it?"
---------------------------
Matt: "Hey Kyle! Did you hear about the plan to get revenge on the girls?!?!"
Kyle: "Wuuueelllh, yeah"
---------------------------
Matt: *Undecipherable yelling*
Kristina: *Laughing* "I can't believe you guys did that!"
Brian: *Hits Kristina with water balloon* "Ohhhh! Score!"
Scott: "I think Kimmie has escaped some punishment!"
Kristina: "It's rolling down my pants, oh God!"
Matt: "Score one for the good guys!" *Kimmie runs up behind Matt*
Scott: "Watch out, watch out!" *Hits Kimmie with water balloon*
Everyone: *Laughs*
Listening to: Sepultura - We Who Are Not As Others
Tuesday, August 06, 2002
Hmm, I wonder what the aliens will receive first when they turn their sensors this time, SETI's beacon of peace, or reruns of The Fifth Wheel?
I say we will have no more marriage. Those that are married already (all but one) shall live, the rest shall keep as they are.
You know, when it gets late I try and ponder human existence, but then I give up and turn on the wretched WB channel. This is really brain straining stuff guys:
The Fifth Wheel:
Basically you have two men and two women. They are split up into pairs and attempt to get to know one another, and then they are switched. The whole time the post-production computer generation crew is bent on making these people look as inane as possible (by having small alien armies charging out of their orfices, etc). And right when things look like they are settling in, they through in a 5th person, male or female (but usually female, and one of such devious quality). Watch this one with large groups of friends so you can laugh at all the stupid people. Just don't watch it alone (like me) that's just sad.
Elimidate
Ok, 5 members of one sex, one of the other, the 5 have to compete for the 1, and every round the sought after decides which of the 5 leaves. No one on the show seemed to question whether or not that one guy or girl was actually worth competing with 4 half-crazy social degenerates just so you could make out in a hotub for 15 minutes. Alas, this show gets pretty damn nasty (in one episode the guy had the girls play basketball, and there was some ball-to-face contact involved). If the 1 is a guy, he usually picks the girl most likely to sleep with him that night, and vice versa if the one 1 is a girl (for the most case). This one will really make you feel better about yourself.
Rendez View
Good ol' Greg Proops (from those old British Who's Line is it Anyways? reruns) is back again to show us clips of really bad dates. Like, for a good example of the kind of dates that appear on this show, see "I am so freakin oblivious." They show a clip of the date, then they stop so the celebrity guest and the audience can laugh at the silly silly people. I'd stick to A Dating Story if I were you.
By the way, for you guys that are unsure of your sexuality, here is a good gauge:
This only applies if you know all of these tv shows existed.
The shows: A Personal Story (plastic surgery), A Dating Story (Dating), A Wedding Story (Come on, figure it out), and A Baby Story.
If you do not watch any of these, then you are homophobic.
If you watch one, then you are a typical straight male.
If you watch more than one then you can go either way.
If you watch three or more and you haven't admitted you are gay, you might have issues.
If you watch either A Wedding Story or A Baby Story back to back with Junkyard Wars or one of the cop shows they show on TLC, then you need therapy.
(Don't take any of this seriously).
(I just watch the Dating Story one
Listening to: Orbital - Petrol (off of the Pi soundtrack, watch it!)
I say we will have no more marriage. Those that are married already (all but one) shall live, the rest shall keep as they are.
You know, when it gets late I try and ponder human existence, but then I give up and turn on the wretched WB channel. This is really brain straining stuff guys:
The Fifth Wheel:
Basically you have two men and two women. They are split up into pairs and attempt to get to know one another, and then they are switched. The whole time the post-production computer generation crew is bent on making these people look as inane as possible (by having small alien armies charging out of their orfices, etc). And right when things look like they are settling in, they through in a 5th person, male or female (but usually female, and one of such devious quality). Watch this one with large groups of friends so you can laugh at all the stupid people. Just don't watch it alone (like me) that's just sad.
Elimidate
Ok, 5 members of one sex, one of the other, the 5 have to compete for the 1, and every round the sought after decides which of the 5 leaves. No one on the show seemed to question whether or not that one guy or girl was actually worth competing with 4 half-crazy social degenerates just so you could make out in a hotub for 15 minutes. Alas, this show gets pretty damn nasty (in one episode the guy had the girls play basketball, and there was some ball-to-face contact involved). If the 1 is a guy, he usually picks the girl most likely to sleep with him that night, and vice versa if the one 1 is a girl (for the most case). This one will really make you feel better about yourself.
Rendez View
Good ol' Greg Proops (from those old British Who's Line is it Anyways? reruns) is back again to show us clips of really bad dates. Like, for a good example of the kind of dates that appear on this show, see "I am so freakin oblivious." They show a clip of the date, then they stop so the celebrity guest and the audience can laugh at the silly silly people. I'd stick to A Dating Story if I were you.
By the way, for you guys that are unsure of your sexuality, here is a good gauge:
This only applies if you know all of these tv shows existed.
The shows: A Personal Story (plastic surgery), A Dating Story (Dating), A Wedding Story (Come on, figure it out), and A Baby Story.
If you do not watch any of these, then you are homophobic.
If you watch one, then you are a typical straight male.
If you watch more than one then you can go either way.
If you watch three or more and you haven't admitted you are gay, you might have issues.
If you watch either A Wedding Story or A Baby Story back to back with Junkyard Wars or one of the cop shows they show on TLC, then you need therapy.
(Don't take any of this seriously).
(I just watch the Dating Story one
Listening to: Orbital - Petrol (off of the Pi soundtrack, watch it!)
Sunday, August 04, 2002
OH MY GOD. It's been so long! And we have so much catching up to do!!
Ok ok, I know I've been bad... haven't posted in 2 days. I have a rightful excuse: Neverwinter Nights. I'll get to that eventually. First a recap and some reviews:
Friday: Farscape
Forget Star Trek, Babylon 5, even cast aside your pathetic Buffy the Vampire slayer. Watch Farscape: every Friday night at 10pm and 12 am EST.
Farscape is by far the best sci-fi show on television. It isn't as uninventive as Star Trek (sorry Patrick) as horrible looking as Babylon 5 (widescreen? give me a break) and don't let me get started on Buffy. Farscape is sleek, sexy, and inventive. The show is well into its 4th season, but I'll try and do a quick sorta recap someday.
Saturday: Neverwinter Nights
Absolutely brilliant game. Not only does it come with a full single player experience, but it also has an easy to use toolset for your own levels and design modules and a Dungeon Master control mode (for all you D&D geeks). Anyway, enough of that.
Today was a boring dreary day, so I went go see Signs with Mom (am I not a good son?). It was quite enjoyable, but had some faults. (Probably my second favorite of the directors three films, Unbreakable, Signs, and then The Sixth Sense in last). The movie seemed torn between being a slight comedy (it didn't seem to take itself seriously on more than one occasion, a horror/scary movie, or a 'path-to-redemption' flick. Mel Gibson performed well, and it is good to see him in a less than epic role for a change (We Were Soldiers, The Patriot, and Braveheart..step aside for this one). Overall I would say it is a fun movie experience, and would reccomend the movie to most.
I might as well go ahead and pick my favorite new director (drum roll please):
Christopher Nolan
For those of you into independent movies, you have almost certainly heard of Memento, and you mainstreamers out there have probably encountered Insomnia
will Al Pachino, Hillary Swank, and Robin Williams.
If you watched and enjoyed these two movies, go out and rent Following, his first movie, shot in London in b&w... very good.
Listening to: Eska - Flag Etiquette
Ok ok, I know I've been bad... haven't posted in 2 days. I have a rightful excuse: Neverwinter Nights. I'll get to that eventually. First a recap and some reviews:
Friday: Farscape
Forget Star Trek, Babylon 5, even cast aside your pathetic Buffy the Vampire slayer. Watch Farscape: every Friday night at 10pm and 12 am EST.
Farscape is by far the best sci-fi show on television. It isn't as uninventive as Star Trek (sorry Patrick) as horrible looking as Babylon 5 (widescreen? give me a break) and don't let me get started on Buffy. Farscape is sleek, sexy, and inventive. The show is well into its 4th season, but I'll try and do a quick sorta recap someday.
Saturday: Neverwinter Nights
Absolutely brilliant game. Not only does it come with a full single player experience, but it also has an easy to use toolset for your own levels and design modules and a Dungeon Master control mode (for all you D&D geeks). Anyway, enough of that.
Today was a boring dreary day, so I went go see Signs with Mom (am I not a good son?). It was quite enjoyable, but had some faults. (Probably my second favorite of the directors three films, Unbreakable, Signs, and then The Sixth Sense in last). The movie seemed torn between being a slight comedy (it didn't seem to take itself seriously on more than one occasion, a horror/scary movie, or a 'path-to-redemption' flick. Mel Gibson performed well, and it is good to see him in a less than epic role for a change (We Were Soldiers, The Patriot, and Braveheart..step aside for this one). Overall I would say it is a fun movie experience, and would reccomend the movie to most.
I might as well go ahead and pick my favorite new director (drum roll please):
Christopher Nolan
For those of you into independent movies, you have almost certainly heard of Memento, and you mainstreamers out there have probably encountered Insomnia
will Al Pachino, Hillary Swank, and Robin Williams.
If you watched and enjoyed these two movies, go out and rent Following, his first movie, shot in London in b&w... very good.
Listening to: Eska - Flag Etiquette
